Psalm (55:7-8) says, “O that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and find rest there.”
When we take time out to reflect and contemplate our lives, it enhances our spirituality.
What I have learned about grief is that:
We can commit to be gentle with ourselves.
There is no timeline for healing.
Our society sends us negative messages about grief. (i.e. “since they’re in a better place, we shouldn’t be so sorrowful.”)
There is no wrong or right way to grieve.
Mourning is not a linear process. It is fraught with ups and downs.
There is a poem by Merrit Malloy that has given me great comfort. It says,
When I die, give what’s left of
me to children And if you need to cry,
cry for your brother
walking the street beside
When you need me,
put your arm around anyone
and give them what you need
to give me.
I want to leave you something, something better
than words or sounds; look
for me in the people I’ve known
And if you cannot give me away,
at least let me live in your eyes
and not on your mind.
You can love me most by
touch hands, by letting bodies
and letting go of children that
need to be free.
Love doesn’t die; people do.
So when all that’s left of me is love,
give me away.
Finding The Way Through Grief
After the death of someone significant, it is normal to have to find your place in the world. There are no destinations, but rather, just more paths to travel. It’s normal to wonder if things will ever feel the same again. And the truth is, “No.” We will never be the same as we were before the death. What we start out believing collapses as we learn and experience truth.
We have to have courage if we are going to love someone. Because those we love will eventually die. Everything that lives must die. That is the price of life.
So the question is – are we willing to risk loving someone, knowing that they will one day become a part of our living memory?
That, I believe, is the eternal question. Are we willing to be brave enough to fully love another person? And when they go – are we willing to let them live on by giving them away?
I would love to hear your stories about your grief process. Drop a comment below or feel free to email me. Until we meet again – may you be blessed along your spiritual journey!
Other blog posts about grief: